Aiming forward

This autumn has been like no other, for me. I've had worse - don't get me wrong, but I've never had as intense work wise.
I've also had to stand up for what I believe in a close relationship and those two facts together meant no blogging of any kind, in any ole blog...

Today is my last day as a 42 year old woman, tomorrow I'll be 43.
Since my birthday occurs when the year only has two more days to offer, I often both sum up and gaze forward. What was this year as 42 like? What will the year as 43 be like?

Spontaneously I'd say the year as 42 was the best year of my life, by far. And without wanting to provoce any forces, I predict 43 will be even better. The older I get, the more I chersich the moments and the days and what's more: the people I truly love. Away with the people and the situations that bring me down and welcome the ones that don't. This year as a 42 year old would be the year when I did just that!
As so often, I guess it's a good thing I didn't know it would happen when I drew my first 42-year-old-breath a little less than a year ago. It is so often like that in life: had you known what would happen you would probably have tried to avoid it or change it but after it is a fact you know it was right and that you grew. Again. More.

So, ending a few flawed things and getting out of a few disharmonic places, were good measures.
Investing all of my creativity and energy into my marriage, was another one. To actively plan dates, choose topics of conversation that interest us and to actively send each other photos via sms and sweet kisses over the phone daily has changed not only our relationship but my life. To clean up in the mind and focusing on this: marriage/love, parenting, exercising and working - nothing more - no scattered emotions or divided commitment is the trick. Realizing this is the hard part, the rest is pure joy!
And boy, does it work! I long for the husband at the end of the day and I cherish the weekends like they were actual diamonds of time.
As a bonus effect I like myself better and get to watch myself as from outside of myself. I take a look at what I want to be like and then I start being that. It makes us both happy and that happiness is contagious.

So, the me that was 42 managed some crisis both at work and in close relationships and also drove my marriage (or my 100% of it) from good to grand and hence my life from great to fabulous.
Well done me!

For the upcoming year (it's only 12 months, seems so short) as a 43 year old woman I aim for even more passion, I love passion in life, and I aim to get my exercise into more focus than the autumn's injuries and work schedule could allow for. That's it! Get my body into that shape I've decided on a year ago and have come a long way towards and then increasing the passion further by making myself into the absolut best wife I can possibly be.
I can't wait!

Love that man.

The 42 year old got the bad-ass haircut she wanted.
Thank you Jada, for providing divine inspiration!

After the long autumn with crazy work weeks, the one
thing I could do on vaca day 1 was lying on the floor...

The joy of giving my firstborn a legacy x-mas gift!

The joy of spending precious quality time with them!
Yes, I'm a firm believer of quality time - no matter what the hype says.
(the 42,5 year also don't give a crap what anyone else thinks about her sh*t!!) 

Husband and wife got good at playing, appreciating each other.

Those darn Runner's knees won't stop me.

Take a good look, in five hours the 42 year old is history!!

Have a great evening/morning out there <3

//C

Change

Change is a word people feel differently about. Working as a leader I know some people need change in order to have fun, while some people need to avoid change, in order to feel secure.
In this house it's usually I who initiate change: I drag our furniture around, switch places of lanterns and art and exchange cushion covers and son on, in eternity! My husband? Not so much! He's like:
-Darn it woman, it's perfect the way it IS!
But I know that nothing in life is so good that it can't get better.
As simple as that!

How we solve this? That's simple too: I drag the furniture around when he's not here! And he will sigh but he'll accept, because he knows how I work, that I need this and he loves me. He also knows, by now, that I know my stuff and usually he'll agree that it did get better.

No rule without acceptions: I can listen to the same ole music year after year after year and I can cook my ole favourites when it comes to food, year after year after year..... Hubs will have none of that, he needs change in that area. Here he'll say:
-Jeeeeez, woman do you still listen to this playlist????! I can't believe it!

One thing is for certain: change will always happen. The life-death-life cycle will always continue and I think my paternal grandfather said it well:
-The only thing in life that you know for sure is that nothing will turn out the way you thought!
That is both scary and exciting, I think!
You definately need to let the old die in order to welcome the new, whatever it will be.

My husband and I will both welcome change in our professional lives this autumn. My unit got extended to twice its size and instead of two different workplaces, I'll manage five. It means new boss, new office and new co-workers and even new colleagues. I could tell the change was about to come, at the end of my vacation, since I had nightmares every night the last days. It was not a bad thing, it's the way my mentality works, it prepares me this way.
This passed week was the first week at my new job, you could say. My stuff got moved to the new digs (some remain at the old place), I claimed my place at the new office and it's a great new room there and my new boss was back from vacation. I have nightmares no more and I feel ready to kick some *ss, come fall!

My husband - yes, The Marcus - has had quite the journey in professional life: from getting his PhD, starting a company that he wasn't quite comfortable working with, he got into re-schooling (via unemployment) and has been studying 200% in order to get a degree in his childhood dream profession: economy! Via summer job as a caretaker of elderly he applied for and got a great position before he's even done with his studies!! Yeah, joy was all around this summer when he got offered the position!
His autumn will be starting the new job, in a new town and also continuing his studies but maybe just 50% instead.
I bet I don't swing for the fence if I say we'll be tired folks this autumn?! But happy!

Funnily enough we have never been as much in love as we are right now and have been the last six months. It seems when the going gets tough the tough sure gets loving and every minute or hour we get to have together are times we treasure so much, that we actually do celebrate them! And that does wonder for the marriage.

So I conclude: I am a pretty happy person right now and I feel love and loved, I feel challenged in a good way at work and I love my sons, husband and dog so very much. I'm in a goooooood phase and I hope it stays for a looooooong time!
I also conclude that I love change, thrive on it and find that a particularly exciting part of life - the "never knowing".

When my firstborn and his girlfriend were here I was extra happy, of course and so I leave with some pics from around that time.

Cleaning the ugly tiles that we aren't allowed to change.

Actually quite good fun!

Teasing the wife...!

Enjoying that!

He got bored with the goings on and took a break!

Dropping this! This time it didn't fall over my face and chest, like last time....!!!

Someone turned 8...

That was a good day in life.

He had a day off <3

Summer kept on.

And did a great job!!

I discovered no less than six wounded parts and had to stop exercising... 

Not getting too bummed.

Playing Kinect with his bro and his girl!

<3 <3 <3

Lots of huge lego projects to get going!

Yours truly.

We have got swallows living in our house <3

Summertime, I'm in  love!

So, with change, I guess effort inevitably follows? You must try harder, think new and get new perspectives. You get more alert and present and nothing is routine. 

Ending this post stating that I love change, after having rearranged some art in our house and going downstairs to listen to my old music and cook a sure thing that I've cooked a million times before ;-D

Have a great new week y'all!