Sunday, October 20, 2013

How do you view relationships in your life?

When someone I used to count as friend all of a sudden let me down in an area I never would have predicted, I really started thinking of friendships and relationships and how we regard them and how we treat them.
Sometimes telling someone "the truth" when they ask you for it may mean they turn away, cause the truth was not the the version they wanted you to feed them. If you're brave enough to stand honest, you simply must calculate that that could be an effect.
I've come to a part of my life where I calcuate it and also cherish that from others: if I ask for the true opinion, I want it regardless. It may hurt but not nearly as much as lying to yourself will hurt you, at the end of the day.

My life has virually taught me "no pain, no gain" and going through hard times, doing wrong and also being a leader has forced me to face myself and looking very deep in to that mirror at all the flaws and fears that I have. I have looked at them (still do), taken them out, turned them over, tasted them, accepted the ones I must and changed a few that were unacceptable and put the entire pack back.
I face myself daily and scrutinize myself and question my doings and even more my "feeling:s" and I think that I may therefore also take for granted that others do so too.
I sometimes forget that others may not have come that far yet, they have a few quarters left before they reach that square.
I have a lot of quarters left too, of course, and the map never ends.

I always ask my heart what is right and true, nowadays, before every decision and I care not what others advice and say, if that's in opposition of what my heart says. For many years my fear would pose as my heart, misguiding me, and back then I could not listen to my heart, because it was my fear talking. These days I see my fear when it shows up and I put my trust in my heart when I ask for guidance and now - at the age of 42 - it works, so it's a solid process in which I'm secure and at peace.

No pain, no gain = a whole lot of pain, a whole lot of gain!
:-)

******


So, The Boy had his b-day party a bit delayed, together with a friend. 
Going there, through fall landscape, was spectacular!




We're there!!




Very up-tempo:ed place...!


Gifts - that's all good!






A lively group.






Cheerful times!




:-) <3




Autumn mornings look like this, only totally dark outside nowadays.


October, for ya'!




Those colours!!!






Loving looking at birds, just as his mama!






Special times of calmer days and glorious colouring.




Lovely times.


Cosiness comes knocking - and we're all fired up for it :-)




******

I'm very proud of the relationship I have built together with my husband, because we're both committed. Not just in the sense of "being married, being in a committed relationship", I mean committed in the sense where both of us not only just look at ourselves in the mirror - we look at each other too. 
We admit to our failures and each other's failures, we talk about them and we decide to stick around, to go forward together with force and trust and goals forward. With enthusiasm even, since the pain-gain can lead you anywhere really! 
We keep letting the old relationship die, so that a new one can be born. I'd say we're brave and active in our relationship and we care for deep down real about each other's life. There's no plan B, since we are not going to be distracted from plan A, which is a relationship that's for life.

I'm ready for the new week. I hope you are too!
/A



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