When do you feel intensely in the middle of life and almost eerily happy?
When I thought about this topic I got stuck at the "void" part, since I'm not sure there is always a void to be filled in life and maybe not everyone ever has had a void? Still I do believe that there is some part of my inside, at least, where there is a question about the meaning and the future and the filling of the days. May not so much be a void, as it is a question?
There are - however - times when I lack absolutely nothing and when I can literally feel and almost see the energy I have inside me shining out, reaching others. I have so much of it and it is so productive that it seems to grow faster within me than it shines out! At those times there sure is no void in there so in that perspective I guess there is a filling of a void at those times.
What do I do at those times, that put me into that state of energy? I engage in things that consume me and it's when I create something new, when my mind is in motion and it's very often including other people. Creating together is magical, to me, and I feel I'm at a higher lever when doing so.
Different fun projects, hence, with my son or a good friend is something that tickles me into shining but also writing this and writing my novel even if that means being with noone else. It boils down to this: passion!
This passed week at work I felt it at multiple times and it was always in meetings with new co-workers or colleagues. In the middle of the conversations I will feel like flowers start growing deep in my stomach, only to bloom in my chest and shoot buds out of my brain.
When does that happen for all of you out there, I wonder?
I know very well that there are different types of human beings, reacting in different ways and feeling passion in different ways. It's very interesting.
Then we have the passion-passion, like the passion I feel for my husband and the fact that we've stuck together for 15 years. That's something!
We've "saved" a lot of passion from the first nine years of our journey together, since the first nine years meant staying alive, together, toughing it out.
After those first nine years there were slowly better days altogether.
Now we find ourselves here where we've reached a stage of never having been better and it's a new mindset and a new life, that I experience. Over all I feel I have a life that is fantastic and it includes the marriage to Marcus.
We excel at being together.
So what it took 15 years getting here? We're here!
I find myself feeling like I'm in a dream (even at 5:15 in the morning when I get up) all the time almost, maybe that's why I have a hard time seeing where I would feel there's a void somewhere?
We have worked really hard on our relationship with the same goal: thriving together and splitting is no option.
Yesterday morning when we sat at the soccer field, chatting with other parents, enjoying sour strong coffee in plastic mugs I felt the passionate love lurking deep down inside and I thought I'm nuts! I'm fourtytwo years old and I'm in love like a teenager, there must be something wrong with me??!
When I analyzed it (yes, analyzing is my new thing) I understood that mirroring each other in other people is an important piece of the puzzle. Seeing my husband joke with other people, describe things to them and then hearing their response are also building blocks towards respect and admiration.
We have come a long way from that precious moment, when time stood still, when Marcus put his finger ever so gently on mine and just touched it, a second.
That was all it took, and what a second it was! I still remember it vividly and how it made me feel inside.
Three weeks later we moved in together, with all those four kids between us.
(and yes, that IS a totally different story)
Jeez, I could go on for days on this love subject!
Finding the mechanisms behind happiness and love, is an important task for me.
Here we are: Legoland!
This part of Copenhagen, as shown here, is called Nyhavn and we visited it
earlier this summer with our friends. Now we saw it in Lego!
Head on, straight in! Still unaware how much fun it would be!
Searching for gold :-)
Drinking some ice cold Slush!
Lots of fun water stuff there!
Really checking it out thoroughly...
Gorgeous summer days and we were so glad we let the weather choose the date for us!
In line to compete in putting out a fire!
Ready, steady, go!
Way to go!
Chilling at the hotel a while, before dinner!
Yes, we celebrated 15 years together that very day.
15 years since he touched my finger (and heart) with his finger.
Making memories, that sure is what life is all about. That and capturing every day by savouring small parts of every day and realizing that that specific part is one of the highlights of that day. To me it's looking at IG pics at that commute train and also listening to my music while commuting. It is also the evening when I spend quality time with my family. I am aware of the fact that it won't last for ever, because I know by experience how it is to always miss a son, who is all grown up and living far away.
I spoke to that very son, by the way, Saturday and I was in seventh heaven ever after!
The new week is greeting us very soon, having some surprises and adventures in store, I'm sure.
Have a grand one!